Weekend Predictions: Some things are easy to predict (Dogs lose)

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“. . . and that’s why you can bank on Trump plus-42 over Clinton. In fact, I don’t even need the 42 points. Trump in an upset.”

(The above pick was inadvertently cut out of Weekend Predictions last week because editors are leftist, tree-hugging nincompoops. Please accept our apologies and visit our offices to pick up your free Kasim Reed blue siren helmet as a token of our appreciation.)

Before we get to this week’s big game between Somebody From The SEC West vs. Somebody From The SEC East, and that almost never goes well, we offer hope to all extreme underdogs: According to Las Vegas oddsmaker R.J. Bell, Donald Trump was listed as a 250-1 longshot to win the election when he first announced his candidacy, and I don’t believe that’s because everybody in Las Vegas has a leftist media agenda, although I could be wrong because sometimes I miss the Tuesday night meetings. (We have cookies.)

I mean, 250-1?

Look at it this way: The Braves are tied for the longest odds to win the World Series next season and they’re only 100-1. They’re practically in!

So now we know (again) what polls and projections mean. It’s kind of like when Georgia opened the season by beating North Carolina and they shot to No. 9 in the rankings and visions of an SEC title game danced in everybody’s noggin. The Bulldogs scrambled to beat Kentucky last week, and by the celebration you would’ve thought they just won five swing states.

Georgia plays Auburn this week. It’s the Bulldogs first game in Athens since they lost to Vanderbilt, which followed them losing at home to Tennessee, which followed them barely winning at home over Nicholls State. Home is a good thing, right?

I’m not sure Georgia could beat Electoral College right now, and they’re never ranked high, let alone Auburn, which has won six straight.

Some things are still easy to predict: Tigers over Dogs and cover 10½.

Faber College

(Where “Knowledge is Good”)

Nick Saban didn't vote and clearly didn't care but his picture was used in this recent ad in Alabama. (via AlabamaNewsCenter.com)

Nick Saban didn’t vote and clearly didn’t care but his picture was used in this recent ad in Alabama. (via AlabamaNewsCenter.com)

Georgia Tech at Virginia Tech: Rambling Wrecked has allowed an average of 40 points and 534 yards in the last three ACC games, including 48 points and 636 yards at North Carolina. But there is good news: I think last week’s sacrifice qualifies as a tax deduction. Seriously, can a defense not stop one play? Running back Dedrick Mills is out this week with a suspension. Great timing. Hokies cover 14.

Mississippi State at Alabama: Nick Saban admitted he didn’t vote, saying, “It was so important to me that I didn’t even know it was happening,” and, “We’re focused on other things here.” What a fine message to send to the youth of America, and those on his campus. Alabama legislators should remember this when they vote to secede from the Union. Saban won’t care because he’ll be working on the LSU game plan. Free swords to the first 10,000 mercenaries in attendance. Tide wins but I’ll dance with Missy State and 30.

South Carolina at Florida: Yeah, that Gator team that stuffed Georgia was so good that they got flattened by 1-3 Arkansas 31-10. Georgia rushed for 21 yards; Arkansas rushed for 223. Maybe the Dogs softened them up — you know, like when you couldn’t open the jelly jar as a kid so you gave it to your mom and she did it left-handed, then patted you on the head. So maybe this is a good week for Will Muschamp to make his return to Gainesville after all. Gators win but take the Poultry and 11½.

Arkansas at LSU: Media speculators, fresh off election polling, now believe Ed Orgeron has a shot to keep the LSU job. Based on beating Missouri and Ole Miss and losing close (at home) to Alabama? Orgeron’s SEC record at Ole Miss: 3-21. That laughter you hear is from Oxford. And wherever Les Miles is fishing. Tigers win but take Piggies and 7.

Snoopy told LSU may keep Ed Orgeron

Kentucky at Tennessee: The Vowels lost three straight SEC games so they beat up on Tennessee Tech 55-0 last week. At least now we know Butch Jones would kick butt in the Ohio Valley Conference. Vols win but take Big Blue and 13½.

Mississippi at Texas A&M: Both teams have lost their starting quarterbacks. But the Rebels have dropped three straight SEC games since looking like Godzilla against Georgia so it’s easy to determine the lesser of two pretenders. Aggies cover 10.

Miami at Virginia: Mark Richt could’ve gone to Virginia instead of Miami. They’d be thrilled with 5-4 in Charlottesville. In Miami, not so much. Canes cover 10½.

Louisiana-Monroe at Georgia State: The Panthers’ bowl chances are officially dead (2-7 with three games left). If you look at the $53 million redevelopment plan at Turner Field, tell me if you can find an office door with Trent Miles’ name on it. Panthers cover 11.

NFL Snack Pack

Falcon at Eagles: The Eagles started the season 3-0, had a bye, then returned as the team everybody initially expected. They’re 1-4 since. Big question: When Falcons coach Dan Quinn says cornerback Desmond Trufant (shoulder/pectoral) is “day-to-day,” how many “to-day-to-days” should we expect? Falcons win, take the point.

49ers at Cardinals: Colin Kaepernick has been speaking out about civil liberties but he chose not to vote, which is the greatest freedom of them all. This dude’s in his Own Private Idaho. (Cue: B-52s.) Arizona covers 13.

Take it, B-52s

Seahawks at Patriots: Richard Sherman was fined for his relative assault of Buffalo kicker Dan Carpenter last week (all officials were looking in the other direction, just like the referee in old-time wrestling). Sherman should be happy. If it was up to Carpenter’s wife, Kaela, he’d be soprano, having Tweeted after the play, “I know what we do on the farm when a male can’t control his own rage. #LuckyImNotThere” Ouch. Patriots cover 7½.

Cowboys at Steelers: Dallas has won seven straight. It’s a good thing Tony Romo renewed his season tickets. But: I think Dak Prescott’s in for a hurtin’. Steelers cover 2½.

Dolphins at Chargers: San Diego voters rejected an initiative for a taxpayer-funded stadium. But if Dean Spanos is worried about being down to his last billion dollars and wants to move the team, come to Atlanta. We take care of our poor and oppressed one percent here (Braves, Falcons, Hawks). Chargers cover 4.

Scorecard

images“A gambler never makes the same mistake twice. It’s usually three or more times.” — V.P. Pappy

Last week: 11-5 straight up, 9-7 against the line.

Bottom dollars: 94-39-1 straight up, 67-64-3 against the line.

Lilly’s pick: Lilly, who has never had a losing season, has dropped a career-worst five straight games. She will be reassigned to the Big Sky Conference after the season. This week, she chose between pictures of Bulldog puppies (left) and Tiger kitties (right). She went for the cheese on the right. Auburn wins.

lilly

Lilly looks to end a five-week losing streak by picking Auburn this week.

Subscribe to the, “We Never Played The Game” podcast with Jeff Schultz and WSB’s Zach Klein. All episodes can be downloaded and heard on iTunes or here via WSBRadio.com. New episodes every Monday and Thursday. 

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Reader Comments 0

91 comments
jj-walsh
jj-walsh

Well Jeff...you missed nearly every prediction...and didn't cover your spreads either. Your record speaks for itself. You may want to get into predicting the obits...

Big Wally
Big Wally

OH:IO 2 days ago

I see 5 or 6 becoming 5-5 this Saturday.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

I know a certain dimwit who should stay away from Las Vegas.

Bwhahahahahahhah

LOGS1973
LOGS1973

WRECKED Schulzie!!! Your picks are as weak as Lilly's......

GT appreciates your always non biased predictions.

Va Tech WRECKED by the Ramblin Wreck....

TOJacket
TOJacket

V-Boy...Your streak against us now is one....we hold the streak for most wins in a row at 8.

DawgNole
DawgNole

@TOJacket

13 of 15

You still addressing me, liar?

__________________

TOJacket September 14, 2016

You know what skippy [DawgNole] . . . I'm not wasting my time posting anymore responses to you vag-boy.

TOJacket
TOJacket

Trying to educate your dumba$$. A streak is consecutive wins in a row. Damn sport...even I know that. One in a row Sally. BwaaaaaaHaaaaaHaaaaa!!!!

DawgNole
DawgNole

@TOJacket 

So you ARE a liar. Still responding to me--despite stomping your foot and saying you never would again.

Why does everything have to be repeated to you?

Again, did UGA and GT only begin playing last season, fool?

As I said before, UGA has a streak over you--many of them, in fact.


LOGS1973
LOGS1973

@DawgNole @TOJacket The dawgnole  isn't very bright and

still living in the Dooley era. He

can't accept the present as his

twentyofseventeen handle reflects..

OH:IO
OH:IO

4th and 18 dogs

bulldog75
bulldog75

Feeling good about UGA's game v. Tiggers.  Sgt. Shultz, you picked UGA over UF and UK over UGA. You're on a roll baby.

Rhetoric
Rhetoric

Georgia will pull an upset.

MoreySims
MoreySims

auburn is overrated---Ga will win this game by 10+

YankeeClipper
YankeeClipper

Love your "Sack Schultz" contest but unfortunately it has not yet reciprocated. I still have an old "Beat Bisher" T shirt from many tears ago, though. Keep up the good work, Jeff.

TOJacket
TOJacket

Billy!...if you got something to say then say it!!!

TOJacket
TOJacket

At least you have a streak?

TOJacket
TOJacket

Yea ...one in a row....congrats stupid.

DawgNole
DawgNole

@TOJacket

So the rivalry goes back only one year??? Is that right, fool?

And you're calling someone else stupid?!

Classof98
Classof98

Schultz's picks cover the spread about as well as his hair covers his scalp.

DawginLex
DawginLex

Would love to get Kirby a signature win Saturday but this will be a tough one. Eason will have to throw a lot to get this done but we have to run the ball effectively or Eason will be running for his life all day. The haters will have a field day if we lose but there is no cause to panic. We have another great class coming and we will be better next year and beyond. Amazed at how folks were willing to give Richt 15 years but are ready to throw Kirby out after 1 year. RIP BILL STANFILL A DGD

TOJacket
TOJacket

Lex....Another great class?.....I thought 2013 and 14 is why y'all suck this year?

dawg fan
dawg fan

@DawginLex  We really really need to win this game though for everyone to believe.  I haven't seen a lot of fire from this team quite frankly.  I remain supportive of Kirby but I want to see some fire on Saturday. 

TOJacket
TOJacket

You better burn some leaves.

DawginLex
DawginLex

@TOJacket  It is. Was Kirby the coach in 2013 and 2014? 2016 was his class. Next will be 2017. Did you go to Tech and take math?

DawgNole
DawgNole

@DawginLex

He didn't attend GT; nor did he take math.

And you oughta see his English.

UpToHerewithDC
UpToHerewithDC

I was having a mediocre morning, and then BAM:  a B'52's video! Much better now after watching one of the grooviest chicks EVER dance that mess around. Cindy Wilson I love you. Can you still say "chicks", or is that sexist?  Maybe I can say it after January 20th!


dawg fan
dawg fan

@UpToHerewithDC  Or tweet it and then deny you ever said it. I guess we can do that a lot too after January 20th. 

UpToHerewithDC
UpToHerewithDC

@dawg fan  awwww. are you still hurting from the election?   You need a participation ribbon. GO TRUMP!


dawg fan
dawg fan

@UpToHerewithDC Not hurting but I am a little worried.  He's already back on Twitter with more childish rants about how everybody is out to get him.  Not a good sign. 

TOJacket
TOJacket

He's definitely an idiot but better than Hillary

96JB
96JB

The heat will rise on Kirby next year also  This Dawg roster is not a quick fix. If this 2017 class holds up and he adds to it, there is help on the way, but Georgia will be a young team next year also. Eason's junior year may bring some hope, That is if Fromm hasn't taken over by then. Eason is playing to the talent level around him no doubt. With a lousy OL and not ONE SEC caliber receiver on the roster, let's hold too much judgement. Auburn SHOULD win Saturday, but you never know. Kirby has got to roll out most of the Richt era to be judged fairly. Coaching thus far looks suspect, But that to will improve. Watching Bama and LSU last week, we look 2-3 years away from playing big boy football

Mulk
Mulk

@DawginLex


Chit kills, son.


Why don't you respond to the post instead of questioning my drug habit. Do you watch other conference games or do you just rely on the AJC to tell you how well UGAG recruits EVERY year? Somebody has been feeding you a pile of chit and you have bought into it.

Mulk
Mulk

@96JB You said OL was lousy. But, the receivers were not "SEC caliber". Is there something special about receivers in the SEC verses receivers in the PAC 12? Big 12? And, Eason is still going to be a drop back passer two years from now in a game that is quickly changing to dual threat? Is Fromm a dual threat?


UGAG has been a "young" team for a lot of years with help on the way every year. They are picked to win the east almost every year since the guy at Florida left. In fact, Tony Bonehart probably has the scenario where they can still win the east this year???

dawg fan
dawg fan

@Mulk  "Is there something special about receivers in the SEC verses receivers in the PAC 12? Big 12?"  Yes.  On the whole they tend to be bigger and better blockers than WR's from other leagues.  Don't ask me.  Ask the NFL.  That doesn't mean there aren't good WR's in other conferences which I'm sure will be your response because you're clearly an SEC hater and that straw man is always the fall back.  There are just more of them in the SEC. That's all.  This is indisputable to anyone who knows anything about football. 

TOJacket
TOJacket

Dawgphlem....no receivers in CFB block better than Techs. You say some ridiculous sheet sometimes.

Mulk
Mulk

@dawg fan


I wouldn't claim to know more about football than you. I am just a blogger replying to another blogger that likes UGAG and is a fan of the SEC? But, I don't really hate the SEC. It has a good team with a couple more decent ones. Just like several other conferences. What I don't like is the inference (the adjective SEC like) that other conferences don't play good football, don't have decent players, don't have decent fan bases, don't have decent coaches, don't have decent size, don't have decent speed or don't have decent receivers. A better term might be an NFL type receiver. 


Indisputable. Back up what you say with numbers (on receivers) instead of rhetoric like ask the NFL. Secondly, so what? I will take a player that has had a good college career getting open and catching the ball over someone that might get drafted because of what the NFL thinks. I see on this board all the time how many players UGAG has put in the NFL lately and I wonder how that has translated into winning games that matter??? It makes me doubt the validity of those numbers, or if true, the validity of a high correlation to winning.


I do think that perception led to the demise of Richt. Richt had the talent but Kirby doesn't?

DawginLex
DawginLex

@Mulk @DawginLex  LULZ. This guy is a trip. UGAG? How old are you boy? Just go away you idiot. Grown men are trying to converse here.

dawg fan
dawg fan

@TOJacket  Well moron they also have to catch more than 1 or 2 passes in a season.  I doubt your little 1 and 2 star WR's can say that.  Good grief you are dense. 

dawg fan
dawg fan

@Mulk I didn't read your whole novel but I'll respond to that last question.  I've never said Richt had a bunch of talent.  Not me.  I've always been very critical of his recruiting and thought it was overrated.  We are perilously thin up front and the guys we do have are not very good.  It was like this long before Kirby got here and there is no one else to blame but Mark Richt. 

Mulk
Mulk

@dawg fan


Agree on the over rated part. But, we were discussing the adjective "SEC caliber", weren't we?